5 Ways to go from Facially Challenged to Cute AF


Ahem. Fuck all them clichés and randomly feel good sayings about beauty. If somebody says a curse word and have an "I just bit a dill pickle" face whenever they see you, chances are you're facially challenged. This ain't about trashing folks though, instead, I'm here to tell you how a 5.5 rated guy like myself turned it all around and became cute as fuck! I'll give you five ways to flourish in time for the summer rush.

1.     Be Yourself. Don't become a chameleon trying to fit in with groups because you are not a looker. I have never seen somebody call a chameleon a beautiful animal. If people don't like you for who you are fuck em' sideways with no protection! Plus it is too much work to try to keep up with multiple personalities.

2.     Accentuate Your Strengths. If you were blessed with beautiful eyebrows make sure they are on point all thee time!! Me, myself I have fingernails that were dipped in angel tears. So I try to make sure I don't miss any manicure appointments. I've been told I must don't do any work, I respond all I do is count money and text your favorite woman.

3.     Hide Your Weaknesses. I am flawed. I'm human. But the key is to turn those weaknesses into strengths. I may not be able to do anything about my dolphin teeth but everything else serves a purpose. My beard, for example, kills two birds with one stone. It takes away from my lining that's leaving like a deadbeat Daddy after tax season and my big ass lips! Without my beard, my lips look like an opened up hot dog bun. But hey shout out to my beard and the women who love it.

4.     Personality. You have to have a great personality!! You're already facially challenged you can't be frowned up all the time or have resting bitch face. I mean you may have to charm the panties up off of her you never know. You would be surprised how far jokes will get you.

5.     Confidence. THIS IS A MUST! Confidence, not arrogance is key. If you don't believe in yourself who will? This comes with your style of dress, the way you walk, and most importantly believing that you're the catch. You have to be able to buy a woman a drink at the bar and walk off and have her searching for you the rest of the night!

These 5 simple steps changed my life in an amazing way. Apply them to yourself and may the force forever be with you.

With the utmost pride and sincerity,